Happy St. Patrick’s day!
There’s nothing like a good list of jokes to get the family laughing together.
We’ve put together a list of funny St. Patrick’s Day jokes suitable for all ages, plus some jokes about the month of March and springtime. Enjoy!
50 St. Patrick’s Day Jokes for Kids
1. What’s a leprechaun’s favorite cereal?
A: Lucky Charms!
2. What should you say to a runner in the St. Patrick’s Day marathon?
A: Irish you luck.
3. What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a four-leaf clover?
A: A rash of good luck.
4. What did the Irish potato say to his sweet heart?
A: I only have eyes for you.
5. Why do people wear shamrocks on St. Patrick’s Day?
A: Real rocks are too heavy!
6. What do you call a fake diamond in Ireland?
A: A sham-rock.
7. How can you spot a jealous shamrock?
A: It will be green with envy!
8. Why do leprechauns love to garden?
A: They have green thumbs!
9. Why do leprechauns recycle?
A: They like to go green!
10. What do you call a leprechaun who gets sent to jail?
A: A lepre-con!
11. How is a good friend like a four-leaf clover?
A: They’re hard to find!
12. What kind of bow can’t be tied?
A: A rainbow!
13. Why is it difficult to borrow money from a leprechaun?
A: Because he’s always a little short.
14. What is Dwayne Johnson’s Irish nickname?
A: The Sham-Rock.
15. What has eyes but can’t see?
A: A potato
16. Where can you always find “gold,” but there’s no gold at all?
A: In the dictionary
17. How many gold coins can a leprechaun throw in an empty pot?
A: One. After that, it’s no longer empty.
18. When is an Irish potato not an Irish potato?
When it’s a french fry
19. Knock-knock! Who’s there? Irish. Irish who?
Irish you a happy St. Patrick’s Day!
20. Knock-knock! Who’s there? Warren. Warren who?
Warren anything green for St. Patrick’s Day?
21. Where do leprechauns live?
A: In lepre-condos.
22. When does a leprechaun cross the road?
A: When it turns green!
23. How can you tell if a leprechaun likes your joke?
A: He’s Dublin over with laughter!
24. Why shouldn’t you iron a four-leaf clover?
You might press your luck!
25. What kind of music should you listen to on St. Patrick’s Day?
A: Sham-rock and roll.
26. Where can you always find a shamrock?
A: In the dictionary.
27. What did one shamrock say to the other when it saw a leprechaun?
A: Look clover there.
28. What do you say to the smartest person you know on St. Patrick’s Day?
A: You’re very clover!
29. What instrument does a showoff play on St. Patrick’s Day?
A: The brag-pipe!
30. How old are leprechauns?
A: So old that they can remember when rainbows were black and white.
31. How did the leprechaun go to the moon?
A: In a sham-rocket.
32: Why do frogs like St. Patrick’s Day?
A: Because they’re always wearing green!
33. Knock, knock! Who’s there? Potty. Potty who?
A: Potty gold at the end of the rainbow.
34. Knock, knock! Who’s there? Irish. Irish who?
Irish I could find a 4-leaf clover.
35. What do you get when two leprechauns have a conversation?
A: A lot of small talk
36. Where do leprechauns sit to relax?
A: Shamrocking chairs.
37. What did the naughty leprechaun get for Christmas?
A: A pot of coal.
38. What did the referee say on St. Patrick’ Day at the end of the soccer match?
A: Game Clover.
39. Why did the leprechaun turn down a bowl of soup?
A: Because he already had a pot of gold.
40. What kind of spells do leprechauns use?
A: Lucky Charms!
41. What do you call an earthquake that happens on St. Ptrick’s Day?
A: A Shamrock Shake!
42. What did the leprechaun say when the video game ended?
A: Game clover
43. How does a leprechaun work out?
A: By pushing his luck
44. Why do people wear shamrocks on St. Patrick’s Day?
A: Because real rocks are too heavy
45. What do you get when you cross a pillowcase with a stone?
A: A sham-rock
46. Why are leprechauns so concerned about global warming?
A: They’re really into green living.
47. Who is St. Patrick’s favorite superhero?
A: Green Lantern
48. What do you get when you cross a leprechaun with St. Nick?
A: St. O’claus
49. What do leprechauns use to buy candy from the vending machine?
50. What is it called when a leprechaun messes up their dance?
A: A jig mistake!
51. What do you call a fake stone that you found on St. Patrick’s Day?
Celebrate St. Patrick’s Day with these March jokes for kids!
- Which crime fighter likes March the most?
2. What falls during March but never gets hurt?
A: The rain.
3. Can February March?
A: No, but April May.
4. What March flowers grow on faces?
A: Tulips (2 lips).
5. What can be seen in the middle of ‘April’ and ‘March’, but can’t be seen in the beginning or end of either one?
A: The letter “r.”
6. What season is it when you are on a trampoline in March?
7: Why did the mom call pest control?
A: Ants were on the March.
8. What do trumpet players in a spring parade do?
9. Why is everyone so tired on April 1?
A: Because they’ve just finished a long, 31-day March.
10. What goes up when March rain comes down?
A: An umbrella.
11. Why was the sports fan acting so crazy?
A: He had March madness!
12. Does February like March?
A: No, but April May.
Spring Jokes for Kids
Here are some clever jokes for the entire spring season:
1. Did you meet that mushroom over there, I hear he’s the life of the party.
He’s a pretty fun-gi!
2. What do you call a rabbit with fleas?
A: Bugs Bunny.
3. Why was the bee mad?
A: You’d be mad too if someone stole your honey!
4. Why is the letter A like a flower?
A: A bee comes after it!
5. What did the big flower say to the little one?
A: You’re really growing, bud!
6. How do you know that bees are happy?
A: Because they hum while they work.
7. What did the mother worm say to the little worm who was late?
A: Where in earth have you been?”
8. Why did the robin go to the hospital?
A: It needed tweetment!
9. What’s a baby chick’s favorite plant?
10. What do you get when you plant kisses?
11. What do you call a girl with a frog on her head?
12. Why did the farmer bury all his money?
A: To make his soil rich!
13. What did the summer say to the spring?
A: Help! I’m going to fall.
14. What kind of garden does a baker have?
A: A “flour” garden.
15. Why did the farmer plant a seed in his pond?
A: He was trying to grow a water-melon.
16. Can bees fly in the rain?
A: Not without their little yellow jackets!
17. What do you call a grizzly bear caught in the rain?
A: A drizzly bear.
18. What type of bird should you never take to the bank?
A: A ROBin.
19. Why couldn’t the flower ride its bike?
A: It lost its petals.
20. Why did the worm cross the ruler?
A: To become an inchworm.
21: How does a bee brush its hair?
A: With its honeycomb.
22. What is Spring’s favorite kind of pickles?
23. What do you call a well-dressed lion?
A: A dandy lion!
24: How does the sun listen to music?
A: On its ray-dio!
25. What is the best flower for a boy to give his mom?
26. What kind of socks does a gardener wear?
A: Garden hose.
27. What do you call two young married spiders?
A: Newly webs.
28. What do you call it when worms take over the world?
A: Global Worming.
29. What did the seed say to the flower?
A: OK, Bloomer.
30: Why are frogs so happy?
A: They eat whatever bugs them.
31: What did the tree say to spring?
A: What a re-leaf.
32. When is it impossible to plant spring flowers?
When you haven’t botany
33. Why are oak trees so forgiving?
Every spring they turn over a new leaf
34. What did the sprout say when he saw his friend?
35. What season is best to go on a trampoline?
36. Been washing my trampoline.
Seemed time to do some spring cleaning.
37. What did the spring say to the airplane?
38. Did you see the other day the bed store is having a spring sale?
The rest of the bed is still full price though.
39. How do you make a pool bouncy?
Add spring water .
40. I heard you bought a new bed! Did you get a spring mattress?
Oh no, I use it all year.
41. What do sheep do on a sunny spring day?
Have a Baa baa cue!
42. Why was the baby strawberry sad?
His mom was in a jam.
Spring Knock Knock Jokes
Here is a list of funny knock-knock jokes for spring.
1. Knock, knock!
Butter bring an umbrella, it’s raining!
2. Knock, knock!
3. Knock, knock!
Rover the rainbow!
4. Knock, knock!
Beezer buzzing, it must be spring.
5. Knock Knock
June. June who?
“June know any good knock knock jokes?”
6. Knock, knock!
Worm in here, isn’t it?
Knock, Knock. Who’s there? Rain. Rain who? You’re not going to tell me to go away and come again another day?
7. Knock, Knock.
8. Knock, Knock.
Bunny you should ask!
9. Knock, Knock.
Gardin’ the door like that is rude!
10. Knock, knock.
Honey bee who?
Honey bee a dear and get me some water.
11. Knock, knock.
Some bunny who?
Some bunny has been eating all my carrots!
12. Knock, knock.
Is there an owl in here?
13. Knock, knock.
Leaf me alone!
14. Knock, knock.
Water you doing in my house?
15. Knock, knock.
Robin your house!
16. Knock, knock.
Turnip the volume, it’s quiet in here.
17. Knock Knock
Arthur any more Easter Eggs left for me?
What is your favorite joke for spring? Send us your springtime jokes by emailing firstname.lastname@example.org.